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If Micro$oft built cars

 
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Dr. Dread
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Joined: 03 Aug 2001
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Location: Copenhagen, Denmark

PostPosted: Wed Sep 25, 2002 9:06 am    Post subject: If Micro$oft built cars Reply with quote

Well, this one is rather off-topic than new topic. Just couldn't help sharing it (although some of you may know it already):

Razz Laughing Very Happy

***********************

Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated :
"If General Motors had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has,
we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."


In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving
cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have
to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it,
and reopen the windows before you could continue.
For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to
shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Only one person at a time could use the car unless you bought "CarNT", but then
you would have to buy more seats.

6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times
as fast and twice as easy to drive-but would only run on five percent of the roads.

7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced
by a single "General Protection Fault" warning light.

8. New seats would force everyone to have the same sized butt.

9. The airbag system would ask, "are you sure?" before deploying.

10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let
you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold
of the radio antenna.

11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally
road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need nor want them.
Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to
diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation
by the Justice Dept.

12. Every time GM introduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn to drive all
over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

13. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

********************

That's it - go ahead and flame me for spamming this forum Cool

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FreezingFire
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Joined: 23 Jun 2002
Posts: 3508

PostPosted: Wed Sep 25, 2002 9:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing LOL! Laughing
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FreezingFire
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LiquidCode
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Joined: 05 Dec 2000
Posts: 1751
Location: Space and Time

PostPosted: Thu Sep 26, 2002 10:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh man, That's just funny! Laughing
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